Your child is being cyberbullied: what to do, step by step
A calm, practical plan for the first hour, the first week and beyond when your child is being bullied online.
- First: listen, reassure, and don't take the phone away.
- Save evidence, then block, report and adjust privacy settings.
- Involve the school when classmates are involved, and the police for threats, sexual content or extortion.
Finding out your child is being bullied online is painful. You may feel angry, protective, or want to message the other child's parents right now. Take a breath. A calm, step-by-step response helps your child most.
In the first hour
1. Listen
Let your child tell the whole story. Don't interrupt to ask why they didn't tell you sooner.
2. Reassure
"Thank you for telling me. This isn't your fault. We'll handle it together."
3. Don't take the phone away
Even if the bullying happens on the phone, taking it feels like punishment for telling. It also cuts your child off from friends who support them.
4. Check their safety
If there are threats of violence, sexual images, extortion or any sign your child might hurt themselves, act now: call 911 for immediate danger, or the NCMH crisis hotline 1553 for emotional crisis.
In the next day
5. Save evidence
Take screenshots that show the message, the sender's username, and the date and time. Save links to posts. See how to save evidence.
6. Don't respond
Help your child avoid replying, especially in anger. Responses often escalate things and can be screenshotted and used against them.
7. Block and report
Block the accounts involved and report them using the app's report feature. Most platforms act faster on reports of harassment of minors, threats, impersonation and sharing private images.
8. Tighten privacy
- Set accounts to private.
- Limit who can comment, message and tag your child.
- Turn on comment filters for offensive words.
- Leave group chats that are being used to bully.
In the next week
9. Contact the school
If classmates are involved, even if it happened outside school hours, contact the school. Under the Anti-Bullying Act (RA 10627), schools must have procedures to deal with bullying, including cyberbullying. Bring your evidence, stay factual, and ask what steps they'll take and when you'll hear back. See the Anti-Bullying Act and your child's school.
10. Think carefully before contacting the other parents
It can help when you know them well. It can also escalate. Often it's better to let the school mediate.
11. Report to authorities if needed
Report to the CICC (1326), the PNP or the NBI if there are:
- Threats of violence
- Sexual images or sexual harassment
- Extortion
- Identity theft or persistent impersonation
- Hate based on gender, religion, ethnicity or disability
In the weeks after
12. Keep checking in
The emotional effects can last after the bullying stops. Ask how they're doing. Watch sleep, mood and school attendance.
13. Build support
Encourage time with supportive friends, family and activities they enjoy offline. Consider talking to the school guidance counsellor.
14. Get help if needed
If your child seems persistently low, anxious, or talks about not wanting to live, get professional help. See cyberbullying and mental health.
eGuard sets up screen time, bedtime and app rules on your child's phone and checks that each one is really on. Free for one child.